Funny New Year Resolutions

[johnrite]

Check out these funny and innovative New Year's Resolutions! Enjoy these and make some for yourself...Surely you will enjoy!!

Just for today, I will not sit in my living room all day in my nightdress. Instead, I will move my computer into the bedroom.
I will no longer waste my time relieving the past, instead I will spend it worrying about the future.
I will not bore my boss by with the same excuse for taking leaves. I will think of some more excuses.
I will do less laundry and use more deodorant.
I will avoid taking a bath whenever possible and conserve more water.
Assure my lawyer that I will never again show up drunk at a custody hearing.
I will give up chocolates totally. 100%. Completely. Honestly....
I will try to figure out why I *really* need nine e-mail addresses.
I will stop sending e-mails to my wife (husband).
I resolve to work with neglected children -- my own.
I will stop sending e-mail, ICQ, Instant Messages and be on the phone at the same time with the same person.
I will spend less than one hour a day on the Internet. This, of course, will be hard to estimate since I'm not a clock watcher.
I will read the manual... just as soon as I can find it.
I will think of a password other than "password."
I will not tell the same story at every get together.
I won't worry so much.
I will cut my hair.
I will grow my hair.
I will stop considering other people's feelings when they so obviously don't consider mine - if that unwashed fellow sits next to me again, I'll tell him he stinks!
I will be more imaginative.
I will not hang around girls - they think you love them and that sucks.
I will not ring the stewardess button on airplanes just to get her phone number.